Jokes tagged kids

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What do kids like to eat in the playground?
Recess Pieces.
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tags: kids
How do you get 27 kids to carve a statue?
Have everybody chip in.
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tags: kids
Mom and Dad Potato sit down with their three daughter potatoes. "Kids,"they say, "you're old enough now to go out and find yourselveshusbands. We want you to be happy with them, but we also want you to besure and choose a husband the whole family can be proud of." With that,they send their children forth to find mates.A few months later the first daughter returns. "Mom, Dad, I'd like youto meet my fiance, Peter Potato. Peter's from Idaho.""Idaho! Wonderful! Welcome to the family, Peter."A few months after that the second daughter comes home. "Mom, Dad, I'dlike you to meet my fiance, Paul Potato. Paul is from Maine.""Maine! Well, delighted to meet you, Paul."A few months after that, the third daughter walks in. "Mom, Dad, I'dlike you to meet my fiance, Tom Brokaw.""Um...would you excuse us for a moment, Tom?"The parents take the third daughter aside and tell her that they do notapprove of this match and will cut her out of the will if she goesthrough with it."But Mom! Dad! I thought you'd be thrilled! What's the matter withTom Brokaw?""Don't you understand? He's a common tater!"
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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb?



A: You wanna go ride bikes!!!
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tags: kids
The Compassionate Lawyer

A lawyer was being driven around town in his limo when he saw 2 men on the side of the road eating grass.

Moved, the lawyer tells his driver to stop and gets out to talk to the men.

"What is going on? Why are you eating grass?" he asks the men.

"We are very poor me, sir", the first responds, "this is all we have."

"Well, come with me" insists the lawyer.

"But sir, I have a wife and three kids! My friend here, he was a wife and four kids!"

"We will go get them as well" declares the lawyer.

An hour later they are all driving in the limo to the lawyers estate.

"Sir, I don't know how to thank you enough!"

"Oh, it is no problem. The grass at my house has to be at least a foot tall!"
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Q. How do you keep the neighbor's kids from playing in your yard? A. F*ck one of them.
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tags: kids
Results 1 - 6 of 6
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