What do you call a cow with a hysterectomy?
Decalfinated.
What did the boots say to the cowboy?
You ride -- I'll go on foot.
What's the best way to keep milk from turning sour?
Leave it in the cow.
What did the cow say to the masked robber?
Moo.
Why did the cowboy brush his teeth with gunpowder?
So he could shoot his mouth off.
How does a cow add and subtract?
With a cowculator.
What do you get when you take a bovine and divide its circumference by itsdiameter?
Cow pi.
What did the potato ask the cow?
Give me some milk, and we can make mashed potatoes.
Where do baby cows go to eat lunch?
At the calf-eteria.
What do you get if you cross a cow with a camel?
A lumpy milkshake.