Joke 146

Tired of being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, ayoung husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a largeinsurance policy on his wife and arranging to have her killed.A "friend of a friend" put him in touch with a nefarious underworldfigure, who went by the name of "Artie." Artie explained to the husbandthat his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000. The husbandsaid he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't have anycash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money.Artie insisted on being paid in part up front. The man opened up hiswallet and displayed the single dollar bill that rested inside. Artiesighed, rolled his eyes, and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar asdown payment for the dirty deed.A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Safewaygrocery store. There, he surprised her in the produce department andproceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poorunsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor, themanager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the scene.Unwilling to leave any witnesses behind, Artie had no choice but tostrangle the produce manager as well.Unknown to Artie, the entire proceeding were captured by hidden camerasand observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called thepolice. Artie was caught and arrested before he could leave the store.Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed thesordid plan, including his financial arrangements with the haplesshusband.And that is why, the next day in the newspaper, the headline declared: "Artie chokes two for a dollar at Safeway."
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